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Unwanted Parenting Advice

How to stick to what you believe in without the annoying criticism



There is no doubt that raising children isn’t easy. I can’t tell you the number of times that both my husband and I have wished for an instruction manual on how to raise our kids.

However, it never seems to help when I hear someone else adding his or her two cents about what to feed your kids rather than the fast food burger and fries you gave them one night out of the month, or what they should be wearing when someone else thinks it’s cold outside.  


Unfortunately, every parent will experience unwanted advice at some point, whether it’s from someone they know or a complete stranger. Here are a few tips on how you can handle such a situation:

  • Stick to your guns. Don’t let an unsolicited comment convince you that your parenting skills have gone mad. Raise your family the way you feel is best and decide later if the advice was worth it.
  • Don’t complain. I have often heard people complain about their child not sleeping, extended use of the bottle, poor grades in school and so on. If you’re taking the time to bring up the subject then chances are you’re looking for advice.
  • Sometimes people just like to be heard, which is why it might be best to let it go in one ear and out the other. That being said, thank them and move on. Whether you choose to follow the advice is up to you.
  • Try to refrain from telling everyone your personal business. The more details people know the easier it will be for them to offer unwanted advice.
  • Don’t be contradictive. If you can’t stand it when someone else tells you what he or she thinks then try not to do the same. If you are known to give undesired advice then it might come back to haunt you.
  • Ask that your rules be followed. If you have a babysitter coming over or if your kids will be staying the night somewhere then consider typing up a routine schedule so that person knows exactly what you expect. If your child is only allowed to watch educational TV or has a bedtime of 8 p.m., write it down. That way your rules are followed and nothing else.

Despite your best efforts, there will always be someone with something to say about how you’re raising your family. Perhaps it’s because they have so many of their own experiences to base their opinions on, while at the same time they might not even realize what they’ve just said.

In any event, decide what’s best for you and your family while showing people that you are capable of making good decisions. That way, they may be less likely to offer their opinion when it’s not invited.

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Winchester June 7, 2013 at 02:38 am
HB2313 is the first step in many years towards improving significant Virginia transportation issues.Read More It very importantly provides money for neglected safety inspections of bridges, roads and tunnels - to avoid recent disastrous situations like the Minnesota and Washington bridge collapses. 3800 bridges in Virginia have already been deemed sub-standard. HB2313 also significantly increases the percentage of new infrastructure transportation funds raised in and allocated to NoVa, from 30% to 100%. It also provides funding for the estimated $1B in state construction needs (increasing at a yearly rate of $500M). Finally, the tax increases (and decreases) involved are a small percentage of the already very low Virginia transportation budget and low state taxes (compared to most other states). Delegate May has said in recent interviews that he is usually not in favor of raising taxes - though transportation safety is extremely important - as is keeping NoVa transportation dollars in NoVa. He also said he will ensure there is very careful scrutiny of how the money raised by this bill will be spent.
Michael June 10, 2013 at 03:11 am
The $6.1B in additional tax revenues from transportation bill HB2313 are to be generated over theRead More next five years - which works out to about an additional $145 per person per year - less than the cost of one night at a nice hotel....
Susan June 3, 2013 at 02:34 pm
Interesting article. What worked for me was a program by nutritionist Isabel De Los Rios. If itRead More helps anybody else details of her weight loss plan can be found here: http://www.wowitworked.com/fast-weight-loss/
Ken Wall June 3, 2013 at 02:05 am
Previously there has been nowhere near enough money in the Virginia budget to address current localRead More transportation issues - Virginia transportation spending has continually been almost the lowest in the country (45th of 50 states in 2011) - and the significant local population and economic growth rates have made the issue worse quickly. Note Virginia taxes are also some of the lowest in the country (34th of 50 states in 2011). A large number of politicians across Virginia are involved in resolving the complex and expensive transportation issues in our area - no one person alone is completely responsible - significant negotiating, compromising and patience - traits and skills which LaRock does not possess - are required. A significant step forward was made with recent HB2313, with the help of Delegate May, which allocates significantly more transportation money to our district.
Michael June 10, 2013 at 03:11 am
The $6.1B in additional tax revenues from transportation bill HB2313 are to be generated over theRead More next five years - which works out to about an additional $145 per person per year - less than the cost of one night at a nice hotel....
joe brewer June 11, 2013 at 09:31 am
The 17.5 cent gas tax has been reduced a few cents for a year or two but will be back up there asRead More the wholesale gas tax increases automatically. Northern Virginia will be getting about 180 million of this new tax burden. Using the Pacific Blvd numbers that's 10 miles worth of road. Being shortchanged for 20 years with Northern Virginia getting back 30 cents on a dollar for roads is on Joe May. He did not work to get the formula adjusted. The gas tax was a tax on people who bought gas the new bill and the numbers above include every man, woman and child being taxed 145 dollars a increase of 50% over the gas tax alone plus the additional tax base.